Traumatized by Two

In my last post, I talked about Goober and MOPS.  Last fall, I was really needing some mommy time, so I decided to join MOPS.  They have on-site daycare for the kids.  I took both boys and planned on keeping Monkey with me, as I was still nursing him and he was young and was still eating every couple of hours, I mean constantly.  When we got there, I took Goober down to the basement where the two year old room was.  It was insane.  I am talking like well over 25 two year olds in the same room insane.  I took him in there, showed him the toys and promised I would be back in a little bit to get him.  He walked to the corner of the room and looked a bit confused.  He has never been in any kind of daycare setting at all.  I kissed him goodbye and went upstairs to the meeting.  About 45 minutes into the meeting, someone came and got me and said they could not get him calmed down.  I went down there and he was curled up on the floor wailing.  He grabbed onto me so tight I swear he was going to choke me and would not let go.  Someone took Monkey and took him to the nursery and I took Goober up to the meeting with me, where he continued to wail and choke me because his little arms were so tight around my neck.  About a half hour of that led me to tears and I decided we needed to leave.  I went and picked Monkey up from the nursery and cried all the way home and all day.  He clung to me for almost a week after that, not letting me leave his side.  I told my dad about this and he graciously decided that he would take one morning off a week and watch him so I could still be in MOPS.  As he has gotten older, he does much better if he has to do something without me thank God!  Poor little guy!  It broke my heart!

Goober's Guys

I have only been a mommy for a little under three years.  Although, I like to include the nine months leading up to that, because I was a mommy as soon as that little guy was in my belly.  So, I have been a mommy for about three and half years.  I have two darling little boys.  I grew up with two sisters.  This has led me to be quite clueless as to how the little boy mind works.

My wonderful dad watches Goober once a month for me so I can go to MOPS.  I take Monkey with me and and he stays in the nursery, but Goober can not handle it (I will blog about that lovely day later).  One month, dad, or as Goober calls him, Pa, went for a walk while I was gone.  They walked down to the fire station and saw the fire trucks.  There was a fireman in there, who is also a co-worker of my dad's that gave Goober his first action figure, which he calls his guy.  It was guy with a red rescue uniform on and he bends and twists.  That is all he does.  You can bend and twist him.  Lame, right?  Well, not to Goober.  This is one of his favorite toys.  He sleeps with it, takes it to church, tortures his brother with it, you name it, he does it.  Yesterday, I decided to hit up a few garage sales.  The first one we stopped at had a gallon sized Ziploc bag filled with similar "guys" for two dollars.  You would have thought I bought the child the best toy ever.  He is now completely attached to these new guys.

This leads me to what I do not understand about little boys.  We do not allow him to watch violent TV at all.  He watches cartoons on PBS and he loves some of the music documentaries on Netflix, but he watches nothing violent.  Hubby and I are not violent.  We have no violent people in our family.  Anyway, we got home and he dumped the bag out on the floor and ran into his room and got some trucks.  He then proceeded to run over the guys with the trucks.  After that mass chaos was finished, he made the guys fly through the air and then violently crash onto the table.  He then spent about a half hour ramming these poor innocent little action figures into anything and everything he could find.  They "fought" each other, jumped off of furniture, jumped out of windows and crashed into walls all day yesterday.  Then, last night, we were all in him room and he put all of them in the back of a Tonka truck, which looked like some kind of Holocaust and drove them to the hospital.  (He has a rug in his room that looks like a city that has roads on it.)  Apparently the day was just too much for the guys.  After the hospital, he loaded them all back up again and take a wild guess where they went?  CHURCH.  Seriously?  After all that, they went to church?  After church it was the library.

Oh my goodness.  This boy is just too much for me sometimes.  Where does he learn this stuff?  Is this part of the male chromosome or something? 

Attack of the giant evil tooth!

Poor little Monkey has a HUGE tooth coming in on the bottom.  At first, I was relieved.  The boy is over nine months old and is still all gums.  Now, I am SO STINKING TIRED!  Monkey and Goober have been sick since Saturday and the lack of sleep is slowly killing me.  Then, last night, I happened to see in Monkey's mouth and this tooth appears to be gigantic.  It is sitting just below the gums.  I thought for sure it would pop through last night, but no such luck.  Poor little thing is drooling all over, his eyes are watering and his nose is like a faucet.  Fluid overload.  Yuck.  I hope that dagger of a tooth comes out soon!  For now, here is a lovely toothless grin!

I am getting kicked out!

Hubby has been promoted in the military to Sergeant, which requires more training, so he will be gone off and on the next few months.  He informed me that when he gets back, I am to leave for a few days so he can have some time with the boys alone.  What the heck am I going to do?  Any creative ideas?  I can't even fathom going somewhere without a kid or two attached to my hip and a load of diapers in my bag.  Weird.

Divorce sucks

Ugh.  I hate divorce.  Today, I found out that a couple who I thought was PERFECT together are not so much a couple anymore.  I swear, these two are like two peas in a pod!  They are at the bottom of the list of people I would picture calling it quits.  My heart breaks for them.  I don't think I have mentioned this on my blog, but I have been there....and it sucks big time.  Every time I hear of a marriage ending, it just breaks my heart and makes me think.

I won't get into too many details, but long story short, I married my high school sweetheart shortly after high school.  Looking back, that was probably not the smartest thing I have ever done.  :-(  My first hubby, we will call him AC (not AC Slater from Saved By The Bell!), is now a doctor.  He was in medical school when we got divorced.  Medical School is crazy stressful on the student and on the spouse.  It was SO hard because he was gone all of the time.  I mean ALL OF THE TIME.  AC studied at all hours of the day and the night and was at the school for ungodly amounts of hours.  I have speculated that not all of those hours were spent at school "studying,"  but thus, I have no proof, so I digress.  :-Q  Anyway, I went to work one Friday morning like every morning thinking "YEAH!!  It's Friday!!"  We had plans to go to a Husker football game the following day.  I got home from work around 2:30 and went down into the basement to fold some laundry.  I was sitting on the couch in our family room when he came home.  I thought it was strange that he was home so early, but I thought maybe he was surprising me and taking out for dinner or something.  Not so much.  I distinctly remember that I was folding a maroon towel (I still cringe when I fold laundry and there is a maroon towel) when he sat down on the opposite couch and said, "well, I just wanted to tell you that I want a divorce because I don't love you and I don't think I ever have."  WTH?  I think I was completely in shock because I continued folding the laundry.  What a nerd.  I finished folding the towels before I digested what he was saying.  The man I loved and devoted SO much to and gave up so much for just decided he didn't want to be married to me.  Hmmm.  Talk about getting hit with a ton of bricks.  Looking back, I think I saw warning signs, but I NEVER EVER dreamt it would end in divorce!  Our marriage was probably not the healthiest situation ever, but I never thought it would come to this.  I won't get into the personal problems, because I am past the point where I am angry with him.  I don't want to ruin his reputation or talk ill of him, because that really won't do anyone any good.
 




Bottom line is, that one sentence, "I want a divorce because I don't love you and I don't think I ever have loved you," changed my life more that I think I can even understand.  I think I am still a little bitter towards him because it has given me some serious trust issues.  Mostly when I think about our marriage ending, I am sad.  Not sad because I miss him or anything, but sad for the situation.  I am so happy with my hubby now and I can't even imagine not having him in my life.  He is definitely my rock and the love of my life.  That being said, I don't believe in soul mates.  I think there are certain people for certain times in your life and I am glad that my hubby is that certain person for the rest of my life.


Geez, how was that for a random and all over the place post?  Please keep my two friends in your prayers.

My sick little bunnies :-(

Happy Easter!

So, two nights ago, Monkey woke up in the middle of the night with a nasty icky cough.  He was up every half hour all night that night.  Then last night, he was up every twenty minutes.  In addition, Goober decided to join the ranks and be sick now too.  Mommy is exhausted.  I simply can not fathom not going to church on Easter Sunday, so I drug the boys out of bed and we went.  Hubby was already there because he played for the Sunrise Service.  We opted to attend the contemporary service that we go to every week, which was at 9:00 today.  I got the boys ready and begged and pleaded with them to sit nice for a picture.  Epic fail.  Goober yelled "RUNNY NOSE" the entire time and poor little Monkey sat there and made a high pitch whining sound because he obviously feels awful.

We made it to church for breakfast and by the time we got there, breakfast was over.  Grrr...  I had two very hungry boys.  Thank God one of hubby's kind students let Goober eat her scraps.  :-)  TMI - - He had to sneeze with a huge mouth full of eggs.  It was lovely.  They did well in church, as always.  Hubby plays the bass in the front of the church so whenever they start getting antsy, we play, "where's daddy?"  Goober decided to go to children's message at the front of the church for the first time.  He decided to lay on his tummy with his little hands tucked under his chin the whole time.  At least he sat still.  Monkey was miserable and I felt bad for even taking him.

We got home and the Easter Bunny had come.  He brought a cheap piece of crap Sit 'n' Spin.  Seriously, I sound like an old lady here, but they really don't make them like they used to.  Stupid Easter Bunny shopping at Walmart.  We told Spencer that the Easter Bunny said he could go to the store and pick out something new since it didn't work very well.  Monkey got some Weebles.  He liked those!

After lunch, (which my AWESOME husband made), we all took a nap.  Ahh.  A nap.  I love napping!  :)

My poor sick little guys.  :-(

Put on your big girl pants and just do it!

Yes.  This is what I need to do.  I need to put on my big girl pants and just do it.  What you ask?  Well, I can't really say for sure (because I HATE unsolicited advice).  Hubby and I are in the midst of making WAY TOO MANY GROWN UP decisions!  I hate being a grown up sometimes.  It costs too much money and it hurts my thinking brain.

I remember the days that my parents made all of my decisions for me.  They decided what I ate and when I ate it.  They decided what I wore and how I wore it.  They decided what I liked and didn't like and then told me whether I liked or didn't like it.  OK, that might be extreme, but my mom was that mom that piled a heaping pile of food on my plate and when I complained that I didn't like it, she would reply, "You like this food."  Whatever mom, if you say so.  Anyway, I hate making grown up decisions.

Hubby and I are putting new shingles on the roof in a few weeks.  It has taken us months and months to decide on a color.  I swear that we have put 600 miles on the van gawking at houses and trying to decide.  We finally put our big kid pants on yesterday and ordered them.  Holy $3300.00!!  Yikes!!  That was just the materials!  We still have to pay for the labor.  Geez.  Imaging the Reese's Pieces and Diet 7-Up I could purchase with that!  Imagine how fat I could get.

Anyway, please pray for hubby and I as we make our big kid decisions.  It is so hard to make them because I feel like every decision we make will affect the boys.

Spring challenge....epic fail

Geez.  I really did not do well with this one.  Here are some more days!

Day 26 – How have you changed in the past two years?
Considering most of my mommy experience comes from the past two years, I would say, just learning every day how to mold those adorable little boys to be fine young gentlemen.  It has come with it's shares of laughter, frustration, joy, tears, hug, kisses and complete chaos.  :-)  Those little buggers have brought so much joy into my life in the past two years and I look forward to what kind of crazy stunts they have planned out for the next two years!

Day 27 – What is something you need to forgive yourself for?
Oh geez.  I will save that for another post, another day.  :-)

Day 28 – What is something you need to stop blaming yourself for?
I need to stop blaming myself every time something does not go as planned with the boys.  Every time Goober acts out, it makes me feel like a failure as a mother.

Day 29 – Something you could never get tired of doing.
I am going to go with sleep.  I love sleep.  It is so wonderful.

and.....there goes her mind

Monkey is going through THE WORST SLEEP REGRESSION EVER.  Last night, I was making a bottle at 1:30.  When I get up, I make an effort to stay somewhat asleep by leaving all the lights but one off so I can fall asleep after I feed him.  We use Playtex bottles, the ones that you put the drop in bag in, so there is no bottom of the bottle.  Well, I have made enough bottles, I know how long to have the sink running to get 6 ounces of water, then three scoops of formula.  So, last night I grab a bottle, run the water into the bottle, dump three scoops in and start shaking.  What the h?  There is nothing in the bottle?  That's right, I forgot to put the bag in.  Duh.

I can't decide if this is more stupid or some of the things I did when Goober was a baby.  One night, I went and got him out of the crib and sat in the recliner, unhooked the bra, pulled the shirt up and went to start nursing him.  Yea, I was trying to nurse his feet.  I carried the poor baby out of his crib and into the living room upside down.


Then there was the night that I woke up to hear him crying and frantically ran into my bedroom closet and was pulling everything off of the shelves looking for him.  Pretty sure I didn't put him to sleep on the closet shelf.

Wow, I should be nominated for mommy of the year for sure!

Goober recently discovered a Spanish station on Pandora.  His life will never be the same.  Please excuse my messy house.  :)

Going To The Dentist....And We All Fall Down!

Goober had his first dental check up this morning.  I was quite nervous.  Read about a trip to the dentist here and you will see why this building makes me sweat.  Anyway, we have been hyping up the dentist for a few days now.  We have talked about the equipment and what the dentist will do.  I scheduled Goober's appointment for right after a check-up for me so he could see what they were going to do.  He was a little apprehensive about the whole idea until hubby informed him that the dentist is a drummer, then all of the sudden, the dentist was one of the most fun places you could ever go to! 

On the way to the appointment, he made up a song with the tune of ring around the rosie.  It went like this:

We're going to the dentist

We're going to the dentist

dentist, dentist

We all fall down!

I thought that was cute.  When my appointment was done, Goober climbed right up the chair like a little champ.  They let him wear some cool sunglasses and as he called it, a bib for big boys.  He got to watch Sesame Street during the exam.  He couldn't grasp the concept of opening wide and keeping his mouth open.  Every time they told him to open wide, he would open and then promptly bite back down.  They were able to count his teeth and much to Goober's surprise, there were 20 in there.  He was shocked because he thought he only had three teeth.  I asked the dentist about his dracula tooth (he has one creepy tooth in the front right side that is a huge tooth with two points), and he said that we will have to wait and hopefully there is only one permanent tooth underneath there.  I was relieved he had no cavities or problems at all.  (Mommy had one cavity, stupid Diet 7-up.)  He got a balloon, some stickers and a new tooth brush with new toothpaste, which he had to show me 100 times.  After I buckled him in to his car seat, the balloon blew away.  Nice going mommy.  He wasn't upset.  He just waved and said, "Bye-bye balloon!"  Whew, crisis averted!  I am so proud of my big boy.  He looked so grown up in the dentist chair!  He was completely appalled that I brought the camera.  He refused to smile decent because he said he was a big boy and he didn't need his picture at the doctor.  He is so his father's child.

Random Thoughts- - You have been warned!

• You know you are hungry when you are driving down the road and are forced to eat Gerber Puffs because that is all that is in the diaper bag.  OK, truth be told, they aren't even the real Gerber brand.  We are too cheap to buy those.  We buy generic.

• I am super disturbed to know that I can sleep through a shooting two houses down where ambulances, police and a FREAKING HELICOPTER respond to.  That's right, people.  I don't even live in the ghetto.  I live in a small town of 1600 people and not in the crappiest neighborhood in town and someone was shot and killed the other night.  (I hear it was an accident, but then again, I live in a small town, so I have heard every story imaginable.)  My neighbor informed me last evening that the helicopter even hovered over the neighborhood shining spotlights all over and I slept.  Yet, I wake up every time Monkey or Goober coughs.  Hmm....weird.  Anyway, please pray for all of those involved.  Kind of a sticky situation.

• Goober thinks Monkey is like one of those toys that you push and it pops back up.  He pushes him and then Monkey cries.  I ask Goober what happened.  Goober replies, "Um, me pushed him."  Seriously Goober, you need to learn how to lie.

• My husband is so frugal.  The arm on our recliner fell off.  (Hmmm....I think Goober had something to do with this.)  Anyway, we went shopping for a new one.  He decided to take the recliner apart and fix it instead.  It is good as new.  So frugal.

• Goober now thinks that every time someone sits on the toilet he gets a jelly bean.  The other day, he barged in the bathroom and cheered for me and said, "Yah mommy!  You get a jelly bean!"

• Monkey thinks strawberries are God's gift to the planet.  I am pretty sure he would consume all of this daily calories in strawberries.

• Goober still has an imaginary bunny.  I wonder where that idea came from.  I certainly don't talk to myself.  (Insert laugh here.)

• Last night Goober woke up at 12:30 crying.  I went in there and he said his finger was owie.  I was too tired to investigate, so I gave him a band aid and we all went back to bed.  Am I lazy or what?  :)

• You know you are on the edge of a nervous breakdown when you start finding some of the Imagination Movers kind of attractive.

• If one more person asks me if we are going to try for a girl, I may just snap.  I need to come up with a good comeback.  Maybe, "No, if we try for another, we are hoping for an alien this time."  Geez people, leave it alone.

• Last night, in a five mile stretch of highway, I passed five planters.  Every single one of the people driving them waved.  I heart Nebraska.

Day 20 – The meaning behind your blog name.
Uhh....I am a lady, there is one of me.  I have a hubby and two boys, that makes three of them.  I am not always very creative.  :)


Day 21 – A photo of something that consistently makes you happy.  These three wonderful guys!

 













Day 22 – A letter to someone who has hurt you recently.
Recently?  Not really anyone.  I could dig back into my past, but I think I will pass on that!  :)


Day 23 – Tell us something you think no one really knows about you.
I don't think there is anything.  I am pretty lame.

Best Weekend Ever

That's right.  I had one of the best weekends this weekend.  What did we do?  Not much at all.  My husband is very rarely home for the weekends, at least the entire weekend.  If he is home, he is usually gone at least one of the two days.  This weekend, he was here all weekend.  ALL WEEKEND!!  I honestly can not even remember this happening.  Friday night, we went into town and went to one of Goober's favorite stores.  Menards.  He was very devistated when we got there because they had a fire before we arrived and had to close.  We took him to Earl May to see the animals.  He loved that.  Ahh, free entertainment.  Saturday, I went into town to get my hair cut and get highlights, something I did once 100 years ago and loved!  I went to three salons, two of which said, "WALK-INS WELCOME," and was told they couldn't fit me int.  Two of the salons were total rags about it.  Geez people.  Anyway, I ran a few errands and finally decided on a company to buy our new shingles from.  I came home and hubby and I took the boys outside.  He cleaned the garage and I cleaned the van.  It is spotless!  Goober pushed Monkey up and down the drive way in the stroller and kept him entertained.  That's right.  I let the two year old babysit the eight month old.  Don't knock it until you've tried it.  It was wonderful.  We went to Menards again and picked out a plan for our new back porch.  We have a massive deck, which I will be tearing out while hubby is gone for WLC for the National Guard this summer.  I must keep myself busy when he is gone, otherwise I eat too much. 

Sunday was a LAZY day.  Well, for me.  Hubby installed a new sink and faucet in one of the bathrooms.  He is so amazing.  I really heart him.  He does all of my silly projects without any whining at all.  I took a wonderful nap.  Goober woke me up when he woke up and I rocked him in the recliner while I watched the most awful Lifetime movie ever.

It was a glorious weekend.  I wish every weekend could be like this.  I could totally live the hermit lifestyle.  I get so tired of running all the time.  I just want to hang out on the weekends with my boys.

Tantrum, anyone?

Today I got word that a dear friend's dog passed away.  She has had this dog for twelve years and she was such a friend to her.  Anyway, I wanted to send flowers.  I got Goober to color a picture.  We loaded up the van to drive to the flower shop.  As we were loading, Goober freaked out because he wanted to stay home.  He whined all of the way to the florist.  We got the the florist, got unloaded, got Monkey loaded into the stroller (because I am too lazy to carry him today).  We walked half a block to the shop, with Goober whining behind me because the wind was hurting him and the sun was in his eyes.  Oh, and there was dirt on his finger.  We got the door and there was a wonderful sign saying, "Out to Lunch, be back at 1:30."  Good grief.  So, we started the trek back the van and Goober absolutely has the meltdown of a century.  I have never seen anything like this.  He threw himself down on the pavement (ouch) and just screamed.  Seriously?  So I start the half block trek back the van with Monkey, thinking Goober will follow.  He doesn't.  As I turn around, a police officer is driving by as this is all unfolding.  Then a local business woman.  Wow, what a fantastic mother I am.  I peeled him up from the sidewalk and put him in the van and told him in the most loving voice possible, "Goober, I am warning you, you need to stop."  He didn't stop.  I got him buckled in and he SCREAMED at the top of his lungs all the way back home that he didn't want to go home.  Really?  You just screamed because you wanted to stay home.  Wow.  As I am typing this, he is lying on the floor by the back door whining, "go to the store, go to the store, go to the store."  Monkey thought this whole escapade was hilarious, which only fueled Goober's fire.  Wow.  That is the best outing ever.  I think I will call the flower shop at 1:30 instead of going there. 

I suck as a mom today.

Dad! It overflowed again!

My poor dad.  I grew up with two sisters.  He was surrounded by women.  After we all moved out, he confessed that there were times he went to his office just to go to the bathroom.  (Our house only had one bathroom.)  Every single year for probably about 15 years, we pulled the exact same April Fools Joke.  Every single year, we would yell, "Dad, the toilet is overflowing."  Bless his daddy heart, he played along every year like we had really pulled something over on him.  I love my dad.  He is hilarious.I facebooked him this morning asking him to come over and fix my toilet. 

More brotherly love

Poor little Monkey.  He is getting way too mobile for his own good.  Goober usually shares with him pretty well, but he has certain toys that he is just not willing to share.  I snapped these pictures of them yesterday.

Mommy, no!

Earlier this week, I was dusting the living room.  After I finished the piano, I shut the lid.  Goober shrieked, "NO MOMMY!"  At first thought, I thought maybe I had slammed his fingers in there, but he was all of the way across the room, drumming.  Imagine that.  Apparently, his imaginary bunny, who he affectionately calls Mommy, was sleeping on the keys.  Oops.  I quickly opened the door back up and Goober retrieved the bunny.  He pet it and talked to it and asked if it needed a kiss because of it's owees.  He then instructed me to go the fridge and get the bunny a carrot to make him feel better.  Guess what?  I gave him a carrot.  He has sucked me into his delusions.